Yesterday I told Percy that it'd been kinda hard for me, because I liked him. I was glad that I would be gone for the exhibit next week and then be fine again. He said he had no idea. I said he wasn't the only one who acted different at work.
How was I supposed to feel? There was this guy who told me he had feelings for me (for five months already), but we couldn't be together anyway. Five months ago I liked him too and then put it behind me. Today knowing what I know, it's even worse. Too painful.
Later in the evening we met for drinks. Nolan, Percy and I. We had a great time. It is difficult to be mad at Percy. I don't want to be mad at a coworker with whom I actually get along with. I will use the time at the exhibition to heal and feel good about myself again. At some point maybe I will develop the kind of friendship with Percy that I have with Nolan now. I'm not sure I can let this go quickly and that is okay. I'm not superhuman, I've been alone all this time and I'm hurting.
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