Die Sterntaler 白色之恋

I am a huge fan of the 1995 J-Drama Die Sterntaler 星の金貨 and was really excited when they produced a remake last year. Unfortunately the story ends completely differently. I've been waiting for the worst case scenario all season and until the last minute. The finale was two days ago, but it didn't happen. T-Dramas just aren't tough enough. I love the theme songs though, this is some incredible music.

Guard up

Something doesn't feel right. This guy had been checking me out for a while, so I thought I'd make a move and talk to him (yeah why not.) Eventually I got asked out (that's the trick.) Since a date (or potential date) is coming up, it doesn't feel right any more. I'm not entirely sure if I'm just imagining things, because I want to believe they aren't going to work out anyway. I wonder if I should give it a shot, or call the whole thing off before it even starts. I'm so messed up, I can't even talk about emotions in my native languages.

I didn't know if there was anything there to begin with. We barely knew each other, we weren't friends, I was totally allowed to talk to him, having nothing - like an important friendship or something - to lose. I thought it was a great idea to get to know each other first, instead of rushing into anything, like I did a couple times before. This not-going-out-yet-but-about-to phase should be incredibly exciting and intense, but it's not. We're probably headed towards friendzone (oh great.)

Skin Care Routine: 3 Ways Of Using Almond Oil

1) Daily Moisturizer:

Facial cleansing pad

First off, I wash my face and use an oil-absorbing foam and start spreading and scrubbing it with a facial cleansing pad. After washing it off, instead of taking a towel, I use a cleansing sponge (it doesn't have to be all dry) and pad it onto my wet face. Then I apply some hydrating cleansing milk with a cotton pad. I mix a tiny little drop of almond oil with my day care cream or moisturizer, which isn't oily by the way, and gently blend it out on my face.

I try not to leave the house without a finishing BB cream (it includes foundation and sun block). There is nothing that causes more premature ageing than the sun or a tanning shop. It also helps to sleep early, drink lots of water, drink less alcohol and avoid passive smoking. I actually find it very hard to get enough sleep.

2) Over-Night Regeneration:
Before I go to sleep, I use one finger tip of almond oil and pad it on facial and body parts which tend to get very dry. If you don't have dry skin, think about the parts that get wrinkles easily. These could be the eye area, the hands, elbows, the neck and the forehead.

When I wake up in the morning, my skin usually looks better than during the day. (Don't rub or scratch the eye area - ever. Pad with your weak ring finger.) Almond oil is a very natural and not very expensive product, because I really don't need much. I've spent loads of money on different eye creams which don't even work. It is supposed to keep the eye lashes hydrated too.

3) Lip Repair:
I have very dry, chapped lips. Sometimes when there is a bit of almond oil left over from my skin care routine, I pad it onto my lips, just like normal lip balm. It absorbs very well, unless I take too much.

Damn V Day

Of course I care about V Day. IF it means spending the day with the right person, who wouldnt? Isn't it just plain cruel to wish someone Happy V Day when there is nothing to celebrate? This is typical Chinese behavior. I'm gonna watch Valentine's Day the movie and enjoy Jessica Biel and Jennifer Garner's outbursts. "Now that's open heart surgery!"

Temper

When we were little, I used to constantly fight with my Dad over everything. Our family could barely have one meal together without the fights going on and on, and ruining the atmosphere. The rest of the family was always stuck in the middle, and we somehow managed to not eat together or eat without speaking to each other for many years. There was no point in pretending we were one big happy family, when we weren't. It never was a healthy environment.

Things changed only in recent years, as my Dad and I both became more mature and decided there was no point in making each other's lives more miserable. Or maybe it was my Mom who had gradually taken over the role of making everyone feel uncomfortable and awkward at dinner. When she was in a bad mood and wouldn't talk to any of us, no one dared to have a good time. No one even dared to say a word. We didn't know for sure who exactly she was mad at, but everybody felt guilty. I could think of a hundred things that I'd done which might have upset her. And we would all be worried if AND when she was going to kill us.

Too scared to say "good morning" (because we'd get ignored), but more scared of the consequences if we didn't say it. Imagine this sort of fear for several days straight or even a month. Of course, eventually she'd get over it and we'd all be like "Thank God we survived!" The next time we'd get this vibe from her, our alarm bells would go off like "Uh oh! It's happening again. What did I do/say this time? Aaah, who am I kidding, I can think of a thousand things that she wouldn't approve of!"

We always talked about how it felt less like torture getting screamed at than getting the silent treatment. But who knows? My aunt is a real screamer. Watching her explode a hundred times per day, I wouldn't trade with my cousin for a single minute. Sometimes I hate how stubborn and Asian my family is. Temper is something we're born with, but I'm trying hard to be better. I believe people can change if they think it is necessary, not if someone else tells them to. People will change if they have already experienced losing everything and don't want to experience it again.

What does this mean

Imagine there is this person that you've practically seen sitting right across the hall for months, but never really have taken notice of. When you unexpectedly get to work on a project together, you actually talk to this person the first time. You hit it off right away and you're surprised he turns out pretty different from what you thought he would be. You probably never even thought about it that much, what kind of person he was. He was just someone who was there, you know, some guy across the hall. You've barely had the time to figure it out, now the project is done, you may or may not get the chance to see him again. It really depends on if you want to. I know exactly why you're hesitating. You're thinking, what if he didn't feel like you hit it off at all. What if he never really been aware of your existence either, and still isn't.

Check out Wong Fu's "This is how we never met", very inspiring.